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3The First Three Days

The first three days with a new dog

Type your pet's name on the map and every guide uses it.

A watercolor portrait of Roxie
Your host for this stopRoxieThe first night, and letting a new dog come to you.
The short answer

Keep the first three days small and quiet: one room, a few people and short, calm visits. Let your pet come to you, and keep a grown-up within arm's reach whenever children are close. Some hiding at first can be normal. Every dog settles at their own pace, so this is a guide, not a clock.

Nobody tells you

Offering a hand to sniff is no longer advised. Let the dog come to you, pet the chest, shoulder or side, not the head or face, stop after two or three strokes, and go on only if they lean in again.

What to do

  1. Keep life small.One quiet room with a bed or crate, water, a chew and a gate. A few people, short visits. A blanket from your pet's first home helps.
  2. Let them come to you.Sit low and sideways. Leaning in means yes; leaning away means not now. No hugging, reaching over the head or picking up.
  3. Arm's reach for children.A grown-up stays within arm's reach whenever a child and your pet are together.
  4. Let a sleeping dog sleep.Leave a resting or chewing dog alone, and give your pet a place to retreat that is theirs.
  5. Keep nights calm and boring.Bed or crate close to yours for now, so you hear a puppy who needs to go out, and never use the crate as punishment. Night trips outside: out, business, quiet praise, back to bed.
Roxie's stop · for the kids

Your job

Sit like a quiet rock and let your pet come to you.

Did you know?

A wagging tail doesn't always mean happy. Sometimes dogs wag when they feel unsure.

What normal looks like

Some new dogs don't eat much for the first day or two. Hiding at first can be normal. Still, stiff and wide-eyed is not settling in, so give more space.

If something worries you, ask for help early. Asking early is what good owners do.

When to call the vet

If your dog won't eat after the first day or two, or anything about their health worries you, call your vet first.

Two things we never repeat

Myth: Dogs love hugs and kisses.
What is true: Hugging, kissing and squealing can make dogs nervous.
Myth: 3-3-3 is science.
What is true: It is a rule of thumb. Settling in takes days to months, and every dog is different.
Roxie: When people sit down low, they look less like giants. Much better.
Checked by the entire family.Every tip sourced below.Reward-based only.
Read it together

This moment is in our Welcome Home picture book

Our read-aloud book turns the first days into a story your child can follow. It is in the works. About the book

A cat coming home? The first days with a new cat

Stop 2: Coming HomeStop 4: Hello, Everyone